Bippity Boppity Boo! Wishes Granted.

Thursday, August 30, 2007

There were some very thoughtful, creative entries on this one. Thanks to Cinderella III, Freaky Friday, and Big I am very aware of the cataclysmic perils of allowing people to arbitrarily switch lives with one another. I gave a lot of fair, unbiased thought as to who should win this contest. Here are the winners:

1st Place: Angie
2nd Place (Tied): Shannon, Brandon, Andrea, Natalie, Paul, Whitney, Sandy
3rd Place: Greg

Angie is the hands-down winner of this contest, pushing her consecutive win steak to two! Just kidding. I just wanted to do that to rib my good friend Greg a little. He gave me a hard time about how often my family members win my contests, so I just wanted to have a little fun at his expense. Greg actually won this week's contest. Way to go Greg!

Back when I used to watch the Amazing Race, I had the same thought as Greg about the lucky crew that just travels the world filming groups of unemployed models and actresses. The reference to Zorbing was what won it for Greg. Andrea and I watched that episode and have always wanted to try it since then. So Greg, your wish is granted. Please just make sure that the filming will not pull you away from too many Bishopric meetings.

(Quick note on the Amazing Race. When the closing credits role, the Executive Producer's name is Bertram Van Munster, which sounds like a completely made up name to me. The name sounds so fake that we have an on-going joke in our family that if I ever have to flee from the law, I am going to stay at the O. Henry Hotel under the name "Bertram Van Munster". I can just see fugitives using that name as they are put on the spot by a Sleep Inn Clerk and panic when asked what their name is:

Sleep Inn Clerk: "Good evening, sir, how may I help you."
Fugitive: "Um, I need a room for like a week or two. Maybe."
Sleep Inn Clerk: "Okay, and what name will this be under?"
Fugitive: "Name? Uh...Bertram....ummm....Van....Munster"
Sleep Inn Clerk: "And how will you be paying for your room?"
Fugitive: "Um, in crisp, sequentially numbered one hundred dollar bills."
Sleep Inn Clerk: "Sir, you are the fourth Bertram Van Munster paying with cash that we have seen this week. Are you a fugitive from the law?"
Fugitive: "Yes, I am. It feels so good to finally get that off my chest. I'm tired of the lies, deceit, and constant fear of being caught. Will you please call the cops and put an end to my misery?"
Sleep Inn Clerk: "No, sir, I will not. Fugitives actually make up 83% of our weekday clientèle at Sleep Inn. We would go out of business without you guys. My Six Sigma Green Belt project was to devise a way increase sales among your demographic. Let me explain my new fugitive retention program to you......")

Here were some other random thoughts from the other entries:

1. Whoever made the Michael Vick comment - classic! Made me laugh out loud.

2. My kids are so cute. Brandon and Whitney - I loved your posts!
3. Angie - Jeff nailed you when he busted you for playing the suck up card. You know I couldn't let you win on that one or all of my blog readers not named Angie would have boycotted me forever. The whole wild eyebrow thing is so much more fun than you could ever imagine.
4. Natalie - If I was your sister, I think I'd be getting a little bit misty eyed right now. That was touching. Thank you for bringing some class to this wacky blog for a change.
5. Andrea - One day we will just run off to the Cayman islands, I promise. You can be the Sting Ray City photographer and I can sell shoddy merchandise to unsuspecting cruise tourists. You know, like the guy in Tijuana who sold me "the greatest guitar in the world" for $18 but it wouldn't even stay in tune. Just buy me the plane tickets.
6. Shannon - Excellent insight on Bruce Wayne. I think being Jason Bourne would be too much for me. He seems to be so focused on solving the riddles to his past that I doubt he ever makes the time to play Madden or sit in the hot tub. I don't think I could live like that.
7. Paul - So is the reason you chose to work for the Federal Government right out of college just part of your ultimate plan to get in the White House? Shrewd, Paul, very shrewd. I'll try to get on your good side in the future. (P.S. Daneen - If Paul ever starts painting one of your phones red and mumbling to himself, please lock up all of his guns and call Shannon. She can save you with her crazy ninja skills.)
8. Sandy/Jake - You know that you just jinxed BYU and the only loss of their upcoming season will be to Eastern Washington. Thanks a lot! Saying what you said is like having John Madden say, "Drew Breese hasn't thrown an interception in last 245 attempts and is closing in on the NFL record. They say 90% of the game is half mental." The next play, Drew Breese will inevitably throw a pick. Honestly, if the Coogs lose that game, I'm sicking Shannon on you.


andrea said...

I can't believe you publicized our plan for where to find you if you were hiding from the law. Now when I go to the O Henry hotel, I'll find seven Bertram Van Munsters and not know which one is YOU. Time for Plan B, babe.

And I guess I'll start looking for side jobs like selling my plasma, so I can start saving for our plane tickets to Cayman. Do you think they'll still hire me if I'm in my 70's and don't look so hot in a bikini?

5:11 AM
Natalie said...

Yeah Greg's was pretty good. But I don't like losing to him. He has inspired me to look into auditioning for the amazing race. I hear you guys tried out didn't you? What did you have to do?

5:43 AM
jeff said...

I was hoping my mike vick post would win. dang. at least i kept angie from winning.

6:45 AM
Ang said...

C'mon now! You had me all excited and then pulled the rug right out from under me. And it wasn't a suck up! I really DO want to be you!

10:32 AM
andrea said...


We applied for it, but didn't even make it into the first round of interviews. Bummer. I thought we'd be perfect! Anyway, there's an application that's several pages long and you have to get a passport. Good luck!

2:35 PM
sandy said...

Andrew, if BYU loses that game, it will be because you didn't grant our wish and let Jake coach them to victory. It will be on YOUR HEAD, my friend. Yikes, that's a lot of pressure for one guy to handle. Maybe you should take your wife to the Cayman islands and think about what you've done.

8:44 PM
doyle butz said...

What about me? I spent all that time comint up with reasons why it's great to be me, and then no love whatsoever, even in the "random thoughts" section. I'm about to get medieval on your...oh wait, I already am.

9:01 PM